Happy Birthday Nanna!

Another birthday without you here, but you are still remembered every year.

Over The Range by A.B. (Banjo) Paterson

LITTLE bush maiden, wondering-eyed,
Playing alone in the creek-bed dry,
In the small green flat on every side
Walled in by the Moonbi ranges high;
Tell us the tale of your lonely life,
’Mid the great grey forests that know no change.
“I never have left my home,” she said,
“I have never been over the Moonbi Range.

“Father and mother are both long dead,
And I live with granny in yon wee place.”
“Where are your father and mother?” we said.
She puzzled awhile with thoughtful face,
Then a light came into the shy brown eye,
And she smiled, for she thought the question strange
On a thing so certain—“When people die
They go to the country over the range.”

“And what is this country like, my lass?”
“There are blossoming trees and pretty flowers,
And shining creeks where the golden grass
Is fresh and sweet from the summer showers.
They never need work, nor want, nor weep;
No troubles can come their hearts to estrange.
Some summer night I shall fall asleep,
And wake in the country over the range.”

Child, you are wise in your simple trust,
For the wisest man knows no more than you
Ashes to ashes, and dust to dust:
Our views by a range are bounded too;
But we know that God hath this gift in store,
That when we come to the final change,
We shall meet with our loved ones gone before
To the beautiful country over the range.

Oh Where Oh Where Has My Little Boy Gone???

Oh where, oh where can he be????

I have a stranger living in my house. On the outside he takes the form of my son, but on the inside I don't recognise him. In fact, the cute and lovable little boy who used to tell me that he loved me all the time is nowhere to be seen and in his place is a lazy, grotty, moody pre-teen.

I know that sounds harsh, but I will present my case.

Firstly, he has become dirty. I can no longer just throw his shirts into the washing machine because they are brown. They always need a separate soak first because suddenly his shirt (no matter which one he is wearing) has replaced napkins, hand towels and anything else that he used to wash his hands on. Hey! Why bother getting a towel when you have a shirt so close and handy! Ugh!

Secondly, he has become lazy. His room only gets cleaned if I rant and rave (or threaten to remove priviledges) until it is tidy. He recently complained that he had no wearable school socks. Perhaps that is because I found the dirty ones stuffed under the seat of the car where he was too lazy to pick them up and put them in the washing basket. When he finally did remove them, he decided then to use them as basketball practice and stood at the bathroom door and threw them in the hopes that they would magically land into the correct place. Imagine his surprise when I demanded that he put them away properly.

Thirdly, he has become moody. Now, he has always been what I would call a 'highly strung' boy, but suddenly 'vege-ing out in front of a screen' has become a regular pastime. And he is now into rock music, too (God bless the days when all he wanted to hear were the Wiggles, I say!). His mind is at a different place. Remembering to bring homework/newsletters etc home on the day he gets them is obviously impossible!

He has also become smelly. I know what you are thinking ("Aha....puberty!") and you are probably right but he refuses to wear deodorant. I'm hoping that someone tells him that he pongs soon so that he'll get the message.

He has also become the sporting king of our family. Not a weekend goes by when he doesn't beg to watch some football game. It doesn't matter what code it is, as long as he gets to watch it. Where once he used to spend his time reading novels, he now spends it reading the sports section of the daily paper. How on earth I managed to produce a football-loving child is beyond me!

The whole sporting thing also leads me to realise that he yells all of the time. I am always telling him to use a speaking voice inside the house because it is not a football field. My ears hurt just thinking about it!

And he eats! Boy, does he eat! It doesn't matter what it is, if he likes it, he'll eat it! It is not unusual for him to eat dinner, get up from the table and say, "I'm hungry. Can I have something else to eat!" No more kiddy meals for this kid!

Did I say that he argues? I am no longer the centre of his universe and I no longer am able to tell him all about the wonders of his world....cause he already knows! And he constantly argues and tells me if I'm wrong or if he thinks he knows better than me. It's depressing to be out-witted by an 11 year old, I must say!

He also speaks a different language. This is the language that is speckled with words like 'Yo' and 'Random'. We are also having deep discussions over the length of his hair at the moment. I'm not so un-hip that I can't see the value of looking cool with a shaggy do, but in my opinion, when it covers your eyes, there is a real problem. Of course, he can't see this....in fact, I'm surprised that he can see much at all!

Now having written all of this, I have to say that I do love and adore my son. He has a whole list of amazing, fantastic qualities to match each one that I have listed here. And at times, when I see glimpses of the man that hopefully he will one day become, I am stopped in my tracks. He can be so caring, sensitive, thoughtful and loving. If only that man would happen upon his hormone-filled mind quickly because I don't know if I can last through until it does.

So mothers of preteens take heart! You are not alone! If you are still sitting here nodding your head at all the attributes that I have listed then you have also given me hope that what we are going through is completely normal. I'm just hoping that there are some of you that are still reading this and saying 'Ahhhh, been there, done that but he is sooooo much better now!' Now that would really give me hope!

Friends!

Yesterday Miss 7 had one of her best friends over to play. The two girls first met when they were both six months old and starting day care.

Both girls now go to different schools but as we have become friends with her parents, they do see each other periodically. Every few months or so, the girls get together for a play date and you know, they never cease to amaze me in the way that they are so comfortable with each other. Time or lack of quantity time together does not forego their opportunity to just enjoy being around each other when they can. They play, they chat, they eat, they laugh.....in fact, they fit together like a pair of gloves - so incredibly well!

Watching them together, I can't help wonder what the future will bring. Will they remain friends and always have this comfortable arrangement; as they grow older will they become closer or drift apart? One thing is certain.....they now have the foundations of a beautiful life-long friendship and an appreciation of the importance of having girl friends in your life.

This thought has led me to reflect on my own 'girl' friendships. It's only in relatively recent years that I've become close to girl friends - once I joined the 'mother' club as well as meeting friends through work and through wonderful on-line internet groups. And I now realise that girl friendships are incredibly special. I remember watching Oprah once and she spoke of the importance of girl friendships and the fact that women look after the emotional needs of women (or something along those lines). It was very profound, and the older I get the more I realise that it is very true. It is my girl friends who help me when I am feeling down. They are the ones who nod in agreement with true understanding when I pour out all of the issues that seem to be drowning my life away. They are the ones who offer the emotional support that no one else seems to be able to do. They celebrate my successes and have an understanding of what it took to achieve them. In fact, without some of my amazing friends, I realise that I wouldn't be coping nearly as well as I am today.

This, of course, is not to disregard the impact or assistance that the men and/or family members have had on my life. But there is something special about getting together with your besties over coffee or on the telephone - even via the computer - and pouring out all the issues of life, love and family.

So I hope that my daughter will have all that and more in the friendships that she develops throughout her life. With them, I know that she will have a richness of friendships that will enable her to be the strong woman that I know she has the potential to be.

Recognise This?

As seen through the eyes of Miss 7.....why, it's the stick puppets (using pegs of course) of the characters from the children's rhyme, 'There Was An Old Lady Who Swallowed A Fly'! Of course!!!! (excuse the dirty chair cover but it's a child-friendly one and the only place she'd let me take the picture after she 'performed' the story for me! Lol!

A Sweet Honour from a Sweet Friend!

In the midst of feeling like carp from the flu, I got an email from my lovely friend T, telling me that she'd awarded me with a blogger award! Awwww shucks! It couldn't have come at a better time either because I honestly was feeling shocking so it made my day! Thanks T. You are such a doll!

These awards, generated by Writer's Review are such a wonderful idea because we then have to 'pay it forward' to other deserving winners. So here are my nominees:

Crazy Trace

I'm awarding Trace the 'Inspirational Blogger' award. Darn, that girl can pedal! I am seriously inspired to pedal myself after reading about her fitness activities but then I slap myself around and eat another bar of chocolate! ;) You go, Trace!

My Place, My Head Space

Another of my lovely friends.....Kate. I'm awarding Kate the Thoughtful Blogger award cause she's always writing lovely thoughtful things about her family in her blog. And I love catching up with her amazing children's latest achievements there! Wtg, Kate!

I Love Brisbane

Definitely a 'Creative Blogger' award cause I love this site. Ok, partly because I'm a parochial Bris-Vegas-ite but also because it's so darn interesting. I've found out things about parts of Brisbane that I didn't know before and I was born and bred here! Go figure!

Luckybeans

For another 'Creative Blogger' Award. I was shown this website by a friend of mine and I love it. It's so interesting following the travels and tales of this lovely family over two continents, not to mention seeing all of their wonderful handicrafts as well!

Jeanie In Paradise

A 'Thoughtful Blogger' award cause she writes the most amazing long and interesting blog posts that have me either nodding my head in agreement at the computer screen or shaking my head cause I have no idea how to properly fold a fitted sheet! ;)!

Truly Inspirational!

I've been sick for the last week. I didn't work and I barely got out of bed on most days. My simple flu ended up becoming a severe bronchial infection. My poor kids have had to fend for themselves when my mother wasn't around to pick them up from school or cook for them. Miss 7 though, spent a lot of this week home with me, too. She still wasn't her usual self right up until Thursday afternoon. I knew she was ok to go back on Friday though when she complained to me that staying home was boring! That's my girl!

My week has been filled with sleeping and watching television and sleeping and watching television. See a pattern here? Lol! In fact, I've become quite up with the latest that daytime tv has to offer. My conclusion...not a lot! Thank goodness for channel 10 who have the whole Dr Phil-Oprah thing down pat! I think I'm hooked! I know exactly who went to the Dr Phil house last week and all about Gail and Oprah's spa day. I must say though, that when you are feeling like bler, Oprah is the one to watch. Her shows are so uplifting and inspirational! If they didn't bring me to tears cause they were just such great stories, then I was spellbound by them. I read somewhere recently that she was talking about retiring her show. I truly hope not. I mean, who out there does what Oprah does????

After the Dr Phil-Oprah shows, Channel ten then tempt us with the delectable Ready Steady Cook. Omg! I love this show! Every night I open my fridge and see milk, fruit, veges, meat etc and that is all I see. These chefs see the same food but magically turn them into masterpieces. And all in ten or twenty minutes. Now why can't I do that???? Last week, Alistair McLeod (from Bretts Wharf...one of my fave restaurants now!) turned plain old strawberries and cream into a work of art. He had the strawberries with some fancy cream and topped off with these amazing toffee sticks (recipe is here). Omg! If I could have reached through the television and nicked off with one, I would have!

Now, speaking of inspiring, I have just finished watching last week's episode of Australian Story, featuring the story of Belinda Emmett (it's on youtube if anyone missed it but take my advice and have tissues nearby). You know, when she passed away last year from breast cancer, I did feel sad. But watching that show had me in floods of tears. Man, she was just too young! Yet, she was so positive about living with cancer and about life. I don't think I could have been that way if I was in the same position. How she didn't fall apart will remain one of life's mysteries. Particularly with the media reporting on her every move. She was truly an inspiration and her death was not only a loss to those dear to her but I think it's left a little hole in humanity, too. A work colleague I know is suffering a similar fate at the moment.....cancer returning and being just too young! I really hope and pray that they find a cure to this horrible disease in the not-too-distant future.

In Memory of My Nanna

One year ago today my dear nanna passed away. She was almost 91 years old. I know that 90 years is a long time and there are many who would probably say that we were lucky to have her for as long as we did. But how can you ever get over losing someone so dear to you? How can you get over losing anyone who you love?

My nanna was an inspiration. Her life, had not always been easy. My grandfather was a timber-cutter and often uprooted his family to travel to work. She raised 5 children - each one born in different towns - often on her own, with little money and mostly in cheap or make-do shelter. After my grandfather's death from cancer, she went on to raise her youngest child alone, taking up cleaning jobs to pay the bills. She was a battler in the true sense of the word!

Some years after moving to the beach my nanna met her second husband. What followed was retirement, often highlighted by all the things that retirees do in a beachside community - bingo, senior citizens, travel. It was dampened at one stage by a battle with breast cancer that saw her lose a breast. But she never gave up and she became a true cancer survivor.

My memories of my nanna are sweet. I regularly stayed with her on school holidays when growing up. We often spent time going on beach walks. We did simple things like watching tv together, having cups of tea, eating meals, playing Scrabble....spending time! As I got older and had my children though, my visits became less often (as often happens with young children and car trips, I guess) although we would always make sure that we'd phone or I'd visit on birthdays, mother's day etc. My last true conversation with her was when she phoned me for my birthday in the month before she sustained the injury that went on to kill her. She talked for a long time. I didn't know then that that would be our last proper conversation, without the cloud of medication and injury hanging over her.

My mum says that I identified most with my nanna. We used to compare legs. It might sound silly but our legs looked the same....only hers were shorter! Her death, although not a total shock, was like having a part of my foundations crumble below me. Something I can't fully explain and something I didn't think would affect me as much as it has. Sure, you anticipate that when someone you know gets to 90, their days on earth must be limited, but the sense of loss that her death has brought about at the silliest moments is what astounds me the most. It's birthdays and Mother's Day. It's hearing someone say something that she might say. It's going to places that you think she might have enjoyed. It's catching a glimpse of someone that reminds you of her. It's spotting a wild bird and knowing that she'd have loved seeing it. It's all those things and more.

In the week before my nanna died and when she was going in and out of consciousness, I had a really vivid dream. I was travelling in the back of a car and she was next to me. She was talking to me and she was happy. I was happy to be with her. She told me that she was ok and that she was going. Then we both held up our legs and did the comparison thing and she said that I'd always be like her. I can't explain it, but I woke feeling radiant. Truly happy and loved. Does that sound weird? Perhaps, but I like to think that somehow, before she died, she managed to get a message to me that she was happy to be moving on.

So rest in peace Nanna. One year on and you are still missed!

(And thanks to my aunty for a copy of the picture. Nanna and me when I was a baby!)