I recently read an article in the paper regarding the Madeline McCann disappearance. Now while I haven't followed this case to any extreme and I have no opinion on who's guilty or innocent, the article I read disturbed me in so many ways. In it, the journalist commented on the stress that Madeline's mother found in raising her children. It said that she found that "...her chidren were hysterical and exhausted her" and continued to point out that apparently Mrs McCann said that "Her husband gave her little help with chores".
Now excuse me if I'm wrong, but since when does that make news worthy print and since when does that automatically add fuel to the fire of her questionable guilt? Show me any mother who, at one time or another doesn't feel this way? In fact, if anyone can produce any woman who finds motherhood an easy and constantly fulfilling life choice then I'd say that they were either delusional or they had the perfect system and I want to know how they do it! In this day and age, when we, as women try to juggle motherhood, housework, paid careers and all other aspects of life, I am astounded that not more women are putting their hands up and saying that they feel stressed and overburdened with responsibility.
The reality is that children are so very different from the dream that we expected them to be. This is in absolutely no way saying that we don't adore them, love them, care for them and even like them. What it is saying is that the dream is not the reality and no one ever tells us that beforehand. From the moment that we give birth and burden our bodies through pregnancy and labour we know that this is going to be difficult. The stages change of course....from sleepless nights to trying to manage tantrums to watching them grow, worrying about their diets, hobbies, study, clothes choices etc, to breaking up sibling fights, to fronting up to parent teacher interviews, to driving them everywhere, to hoping that they make good friends, to trying to decide what school they should go to and what career path they should choose to praying that they don't use drugs or get into trouble or make bad choices....good grief...the list is endless! And the day-to-day practicalities of this are that we often feel exhausted and overwhelmed. I have often reached out to my own support network at times like this and sometimes, just knowing that other mothers are going through exactly the same thing is enough to help realise that motherhood is a hard hard job that absolutely nothing in life prepares you for. Would we give it up if we had a chance? Never in a million years! But struggling through without a handbook on how to do it is damn hard!
On the back of this question of motherhood and the stresses involved in it, I cannot help but despise the attitude of Greg Norman towards his ex-wife. According to current news articles, Mr Norman's legal team filed a petition saying that his ex wife '....did not teach the husband to swing a golf club....did not teach the husband to win". Hmmmmmmmm! Now, I'm sorry but regardless of how much money she is asking for, the fact is that after 25 years of marriage and supporting her husband in his chosen career and giving birth to and co-raising his two children, is this what her contribution has come down to? Nasty!!!! And herein lies another example of how to devalue the efforts of wives and mothers everywhere!
